Forceful Reconsideration

January 30, 2014


pivot doors fascinate me

pivot doors fascinate me

It’s interesting what renovating a house will teach you.

You get very clear on what you did right and what you did wrong. Some things you can change and recover, other things you will just have to live with. Sometimes the process forces change on you – regardless of how you feel about it – and you have to live with that twist, too. You learn to adjust and pivot very quickly, because spinning your wheels over the “this isn’t going to work” becomes unproductive.

My Dad has a saying, “As goes your house, so goes your life.” Mostly that was about how your house on the inside reflects your life in general (chaos in one = chaos in the other), but I’m seeing parallels in that through this process as well. There is a lot of “this isn’t going to work” showing up in other areas of life. The plan isn’t going to stay on course. The red flags are waving. Get ready to swing at a curve ball.

And, so, in the midst of the chaos of the final days of renovation, and everything else going on, I find myself at 2am mentally adjusting and pivoting. I’m a champion What-If-er, and contingencies are always a challenge, but I still hope everything will just work out in a less complicated way. Although, here’s a pro-tip: Don’t start Google-ing surgery info in the middle of the night. Nothing good can come from that. (My back likely will not wait until summer.)

Moving Day is one week from today. It will be nice to at least get one part of life out of limbo. It will be nice to partially exhale. It will be nice to live in the space I created and see what other surprises my decisions may have brought.

Because if I have to continue to adjust and pivot against my wishes, it will be nice to do that from home.

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