On Holiness and NOGGIN

June 4, 2007


In an attempt to remind myself that it is still important for The Swimmy to practice reading over the summer, I am trying to remember to read two books with her and to her every night. One, she can pick off of her enormous shelf of books, the other is a story from the Torah (or we Jews’ holiest book).

Last night, she chose Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs (thanks, Judy!) and we read the story of the Garden of Eden / Adam & Eve.

The childrens’ Torah book is great, age appropriate, traditional in its take on the stories and has these great “Thinking Questions” at the end for both reading comprehension and creative thinking.

So, we read the story. G-d makes a garden and puts 2 special trees in it. G-d creates Adam and tells him to live it up, but don’t eat from the trees, dude. Adam gets lonely (because, he’s such a guy), names all the animals, runs out of shit to do, G-d creates Eve. A snake dressed like 50 Cent shows up and totally gets Eve to eat the forbidden fruit (dumb ho) and then she gets Adam to eat it, too. G-d is totally disappointed and now we women get to have pain during childbirth, Pandora’s box sucks and we don’t live forever. And to top it off, Adam and Eve have to leave the garden and G-d puts two angels as guards outside. Way to go, folks! Amen.

So, here’s how the creative question and answer portion of the evening went:

What do you think the trees looked like in the Garden of Eden?

Very tiny. Like this big.

*closes one eye and makes “teeny tiny” gesture with fingers*

How else do they look?

They don’t have leaves. They only have fruit. And no bark. They’re smooth.

Are there birds that live in the trees?

No. And there are no squirrels either.

Just fruit, huh?

Yes. And pygmy marmosets.

Uh, huh. Why pygmy marmosets? (*And thinking WTF is a pygmy marmoset?!*)

‘Cause that’s what Diego said live in trees like that.

Ah. And…What do you think is the password you have to give to the angels to get in the Garden of Eden?


*I had no idea where 169 came from. Until after I tucked her into bed and went to change the channel on our Dish Network and remembered 169 is NOGGIN.

So, G-d bless NOGGIN. And the pygmy marmosets.

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4 Responses to “On Holiness and NOGGIN”

  1. Moira Says:

    At least she’s learning, right?

  2. Chris Says:

    I knew the pygmy marmosets were at the root of this somehow!

  3. john Says:

    You never cease to amaze me…. this was really great. 🙂

  4. Bill Farrell Says:

    While visiting the Royal Tyrrell Museum in Canada, they had fossils of the first “trees” to colonize the land and, in fact, they were >this< big, and smooth, and with no leaves and itty bitty fruit.
    I think you have a budding botanist on your hands. Water regularly and apply Miracle Gro as necessary.
    p.s. Trips to the park are advised, but beware the poison ivy. Leaves of three, itch will thee.