So, The Swimmy and I are driving back from the grocery store today (because, once again, I forgot to take something out of the freezer to defrost for dinner). It was a lovely day and we were talking about her adventures at school that day.
(In case you were wondering, it was Daphne’s birthday, no one got a check mark for bad behavior, she went to “dramatic” center, Team Six did Read Around the Room and GuessWhatMommy?! I got to paint a clown in science class.)
We’re driving along and I notice this car come zooming past me with it’s back left-side door flying open. I consider for a moment that the door might have been broken and don’t do anything, but then I realize there’s a small HEAD peeking up above the headrest on that side of the car.
THERE’S A KID IN THAT CAR AND HIS DOOR IS WIDE OPEN WHILE HIS DUMBASS MOM KEEPS DRIVING!
I speed up through the school zone she was flying through (risking yet another traffic ticket) and honk my horn to get her attention. Now, pay attention…
SHE GIVES ME A LOOK LIKE I AM SATAN INCARNATE AND A HAND GESTURE THAT I’M SURE, IN HER COUNTRY, IS NOT NICE.
So, being the kind, good-hearted citizen that I am, I roll my window down and say in the most loving, good-hearted way, “YOUR BACK DOOR IS WIDE OPEN, YOU MORON.”
(I wanted to say something much more interesting, but The Swimmy did not need that lesson yet. Although it would be totally justified in this instance. I’m just sayin’.)
She looks back and gets a horrified look on her face and runs back to make sure the kid is okay.
No, really, it was nothing. Glad everything is okay.