If you’re paying attention in life, you don’t need a national holiday to bring to light some lessons in life. But, occasionally, those holidays provide an additional day of “ah…yes” for you.
I came to motherhood in an unorthodox way. I married into it. Once I made this choice, I began to look around and really study other mothers and their relationships to their children. I didn’t have to look far to see a wide range of situations.
I’ve seen mothers who didn’t appreciate being mothers.
I’ve seen mothers who didn’t understand their role.
I’ve seen mothers who were true matriarchs, and those who shied away from that role.
I’ve seen mothers who didn’t learn until much later in life how to fit into their childrens’ lives.
But now, I notice the children. And a lot of it saddens me.
I see children who have lost faith in their parents.
I see adults whose expectations are those of children.
I see children destined to repeat mistakes of their parent.
I see adults who have become someone their parents don’t want really want to be close to any longer.
I see adults who have conveniently forgotten about the honor and obligation a child has for good parents.
And children who don’t understand why they need not be obligated to or feel guilty about their parent’s behavior.
This May 22nd, The Swimmy and I will be five years into our relationship. And with each developmental milestone, we both have to adjust to those changes – and accept them. I have expectations of what our adult relationship will be like. I’m not ashamed to say that. But, I know, that working hard toward that end for the next 20 years is time well spent. That way, I know she’ll be a well-adjusted, emotionally stable, loving, strong, caring woman ready to take on her own marriage and family.
And THAT will be the best Mother’s Day present ever.