GI Rebellion

January 21, 2006


I am constipated for the gazillionth time in three months. Hi. Too much information? Tough. I hate this. Haaaaate.

I am supposed to be on my way with Husband and The Swimmy to meet ArtsyDaughter, OldestDaughter and The Boy over at MILtastic and JackTabulous’ place to have a lovely dinner to celebrate Husband and ArtsyDaughter’s belated birthdays and Hanukah. (MILtastic and JackTabulous were out of town the entire month of December.)

A wonderful home cooked dinner that includes Beef Tenderloin, creamed spinach, my favorite Maggiano’s Chopped Salad and potato pancakes. ALL I LOVE. Luuurrrrvvvv.

Instead? It’s me and a big blue bottle of Milk of Magnesia.

Newly pregnant women (and their husbands) are usually constantly amazed at how they can be nauseated and hungry at the same time. Please. That’s nothing. Try having someone dancing the tango in your gastrointestinal tract with no where to go… AND be hungry.

Now THAT’s amazing. And? Totally shitty. (No bad pun intended)

And so, while everyone is going to be munching down on terrific food (one of my all time favorite things to do), I’ll be looking for something mindless to watch on TV and trying to resolve this issue. And we all know how bad Saturday night TV is… at least there will be a good doggie bag for me.

Poor Husband. Isn’t this a lovely thing to come home to? I’m so hott. Pfft.

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One Response to “GI Rebellion”

  1. Kelly Says:

    Here’s a little trick I learned during both my pregnancies:
    Take 6 to 7 metamucil capsules EVERY DAMN DAY of your pregnancy.
    I’m serious. It was the only thing that could contol the constipation. I learned my lesson halfway through my first pregnancy and never failed to take the stuff during my second.
    I know you hate ASSVICE…. but I still felt I had to share my secret.