How to Make Me Laugh 6

October 16, 2005

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Or… Random Things Overheard the Past Several Days That Have Made Me Lose My Shit

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Thursday Morning at High Holy Days Children’s Services

Rabbi about to blow the Shofar (ram’s horn): Hey, kids, I brought the big one this morning.

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Last Night with the Swimmy

The Swimmy and I were going to make Pigs in a Blanket with hot dogs and refrigerator crescent rolls. I asked The Swimmy not to open the rolls until it was time to wrap up said dogs. She didn’t listen — natch. The cannister popped and the rolls were destroyed, annoying me to no end.

“Go to your room until you can come back and listen to Mommy.”

[Sniff, sniff] “Okay.”

1 minute later…

[Teary eyed] “Sorry, Mommy. Can we still make Pigs in a Bwanket?”

“No. The blankets are broken and can’t be used.”

“Oh. Well, can we make Pigs in a Sheet instead?”

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This Morning Before Leaving for the Grocery Store

“Swimmy? You got your shoes on?”

“Yep. Let’s do this.”

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